He's Still Got It

By "he" I mean "me".

By "still" I mean "up to this day and into the foreseeable future".

By "got" I mean "possesses".

And by "it" I mean "the attributes of awesomeness" of course.

So another acceptable name for this post would be:

I, up to this day and into the foreseeable future, possess the attributes of awesomeness.

And now I'll prove it.

CASE #1 For the first time since Ethan and I coached our Strike 4 softball team to a Men's Middle Recreational Championship in 2005, I have once again proven my softball prowess by winning yet another championship in Coed Lower Recreation. Now you may think I play these bottom division softball teams on purpose, hoping to cruise into play-offs only to beat obviously inferior teams. Well, you'd be right, if it were true. But rest at ease that we played the final three games of this latest tournament on a scorching hot Summer day. And in the last three innings of the third game under the blazing sun I committed six errors. That's right, six times the ball came to me I found a way to totally screw up the play. Luckily we were up enough runs early that my horribleness didn't ruin the whole thing for us. See? Best of the worst. And I accept that. With a big smile. And a shiny new shirt.

CASE #2 Apparently my body still refuses to age at a normal human rate. This only further enhances the possibility that I may in fact be a super hero. Although I have yet to discover my super power and my planet of origin, I have noticed that I am fully capable of doing what no other mere mortal can do. Survive on ice cream.

CASE #3 Kids still love me. I can still take a screaming child, that is not my own, sit her on my lap, and have her totally passed out in three minutes. Of course it could be the fact that she has no interest in my espn.com or the MLB standings or my mock draft for fantasy football. But I like to think that I just bring a high level of comfort to those around me. Yep. That's what I like to think.

Thanks for letting me get this off my chest. Back to making up stories and exaggerating about life with The Dude and Bubble Toes.